nakd ink

Lyrics from the New York performance:

It don’t take long
for this old man to form a habit
and I know some of the things I do, they just ain’t right

So tell me would it be wrong
for me to use my celebrity status
to make love to a college girl tonight

1-315-329-6673
But only call it if you need me
315-329-6673
But only call it if you need me
315-329-6673
But only call it if you need me

Now I know you’re charmed
by my lovely on screen persona
yes sweet and humble that’s always been my carreer

But wouldn’t it be a shame
for you to miss this one time offer
to make love to Jason Segel freshman year

Please don’t be scared
if you’ve got bicurious feelings
I promise baby I won’t ever tell

So bring a friend
to my swanky Manhattan hotel room
I’ll be me, you can be Mila Kunis and Kristin Bell

Remember when I was in that show
Freaks and Geeks
Well there were no special effects
No, no special effects
So if you thought I was sweet
well yeah I’m really that sweet

Remember when I showed my penis in
Forgetting Sarah Marshall
Well there were no special effects
No, no special effects
So if you liked what you saw
well that’s really what I’m working with

1-315-329-6673
But only call it if you need me
315-329-6673
But only call if you’re disease free
315-329-6673
But only call it if you need me

Remember when I showed my penis in
Forgetting Sarah Marshall
Well there were no special effects
No, no special effects
So if you thought it was small
if you thought it was small
well then your boyfriend
is probably
not white.